100 Days of School, 100 Days of Bullying

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When you say the word “bully” most people tend to think of the caricature of a bully. One of my students described the thinking of this stereotype perfectly. “They probably got on my nerves or I really just don’t like them, so I’ll try my best to make their life as miserable as possible.” 

But bullying takes many guises and is sometimes hard to identify.  That is worth thinking about today as the Safe Schools Action Network observes 100 Days of School/100 Days of Bullying. If we really want to stop bullying, we need to see it clearly in its various forms.

Studies show that high school freshman are the most vulnerable to bullying, so I surveyed the ninth-grade class at my school to get a closer look at the issues.

I found that retaliatory bullying was common. My (completely unscientific) poll of 64 ninth-graders revealed that 32 percent had been bullied at some point, but more than half (57 percent) admitted to bullying others.

Several said that they bullied in retaliation for being bullied. “I have participated in bullying,” one student said. “But I did it to the bullier or other bullies when they provoked me.” One girl admitted: “Since I have been bullied before I wanted to feel what that person felt while they were bullying me. Also I wanted that person to feel what I felt, but now I understand it was very wrong.”

On our campus, ninth-graders who have been bullied are more likely to turn into bullies. In contrast, of the 67 percent who claimed they had never been bullied, only 39 percent admitted to bullying others.

Meet Alberto, a ninth-grader perceived as different because of Tourette syndrome. He has been bullied throughout his school years. He’s also taken to threatening others to ward off or stop attacks. “The other strategy to make them [the bullies] stay quiet is to say that I’m going to beat them up, which I’m not,” he said. ”I feel real bad saying that, but it’s the only way I can make them be quiet.”

Surprisingly, even though Alberto has experienced bullying, like many others he blames the victim. His friend Horatio, a student in the special day class, gets picked on a lot. “I told him, ‘Don’t get close to Marco [the bully],’” Alberto says. “But he doesn’t listen. He just goes ahead and makes them laugh at him.” 

When bullying provokes teen suicides, there’s no doubt we need to do more to curb bullies. The good news is that some students are intervening. Tenth-grader Barbara said, “I actually get in there and say, ‘You guys need to cool it off because you will actually start fighting and not talking to each other anymore.’”

If we want to protect the Albertos and Horatios at our school, and also prevent them from becoming bullies themselves, we need more Barbaras to step in. But getting that to happen is not easy. Teaching Tolerance has many resources to help teachers with this difficult topic. You can go here, here, here, here and here for articles that provide tips and resources. Also, check out the new Teaching Tolerance documentary Bullied: A Student, a School, and a Case That Made History.

As a high school teacher, I am more focused on teaching content and skills than investigating incidents of bullying. But my research showed me that me that my priorities must be shifted. Kids who feel unsafe have a hard time learning.

Thomas is an English teacher in California.

Comments

Wow, Jill E. Thomas. Spot

Submitted by Lyle on 4 February 2011 - 5:45pm.

Wow, Jill E. Thomas. Spot on. Great article. I agree with your research and I have similar unscientific findings. I travel around the country touring theater pieces and using drama to teach skills. I have performed in urban rural and suburban environments and I have found a striking difference between urban kids (mostly boys) and rural/suburban kids. When asked to pick one of the following that best describes the role that you play in school: BULLY< BYSTANDER< BULLIED...I found over and over that it was far far easier for the urban kids to fess up and admit that they have bullied others, as compared to kids in the suburban/rural environments, who either did not see themselves that way or were unable to admit it.

I have a daughter 16 who is

Submitted by Kelley on 9 February 2011 - 10:57am.

I have a daughter 16 who is constantly bullied in school. When we went to the school with the bullies names and what they had done, the bulling escalated. It wasn't just the bullies but their friends too. They had informed their friends that my daughter was the one who "ratted them out" so the bullies friends retaliated. Needless to say she is still horassed. What would be the next in this case? I stepped in and tried to help my daughter but I ended up having her hurt even more. What is a parent to do when this happen? Go to the authorities and place a peace order on those bullies? Have a meeting with the parent's of the bullies? Nine times out of ten the parents are in disbelief. What then?

Dear Kelley, Go back to the

Submitted by Maureen Costello on 9 February 2011 - 12:40pm.

Dear Kelley,
Go back to the school and let them know what you've just told us. Ask for a meeting with both the principal and a counselor, take notes during the meeting, and ask them what steps they will take to ensure that your daughter is safe and is not going to face this harassment on a daily basis. Find out what the escalation process is if they are unable to resolve the situation--most likely it means that you should involve someone in the district office.
It's a good idea to get a copy of the school's anti-bullying policy and see what steps it requires. Follow those steps, and let the administrators know that you expect them to take this seriously.
When the meeting is over, email the people at the school to confirm what was discussed, and copy the superintendent of the district.
Good luck, Kelley

As a guidance counselor I’m

Submitted by Henry McNulty on 12 April 2012 - 10:18am.

As a guidance counselor I’m troubled by the increase in bullying I’ve seen in my school. The principal, teachers, and I continue to fight against it, but it’s difficult to reach out to all the students with only our words. But I found the answer to my problem when I saw “Bully” this past weekend. I’ve finally found a way to reach out to my students in a way they can all understand. That is the power of this movie! Bullying must end immediately and with the help of the “Bully” movie we can move forward.