I Wish They'd Ask

As an itinerant writing consultant, I have the opportunity to teach in many schools. I've observed that students who have special needs often eat their lunches together, stay in the same part of the room when mainstreamed, even remain segregated when there is an assembly or a sports event, seemingly invisible to other students.

One day at the Dolphins' Special Olympic swim practice in Oklahoma City, Michael Arnold proudly handed me a copy of "My Special Chromosomes" and said, "I wrote this with my Mom." After perusing this thought-provoking essay, I explained that I'd like to share it with my writing students. Michael smiled his "okay."

The next day I selected a student to read "My Special Chromosomes" to my first-hour writing workshop.

"Wow, he sounds just like me -- a regular guy who likes sports," a basketball player observed.

"I can really relate," said an 8th grade girl. "When I first got my braces, I didn't talk much or smile. I think some people probably thought that I was not being friendly, but I felt shy."

When someone used the term "mentally retarded" in our discussion, I explained that many people now prefer "special needs" or "differently abled." One student said, "I'm not good at football, but there's no term that labels me. Why do we need to label at all?"

The participants in my next class included Susan and Joey, two students with cerebral palsy, who use wheelchairs and regularly participate in Special Olympics. This time, I read Michael's essay myself. Susan raised her hand and said, "I really understand how Michael feels. I don't like it when people stare at me. If they're curious about why I'm in a wheelchair, I wish they'd ask me."

Joey added, "Lots of people act like I don't exist. They're probably trying not to stare and be rude, but I'd rather they smiled and talked to me."

Another student then explained, "When I don't look at someone in a wheelchair, it's because I don't know what to say."

"Just say what you would to anyone else," Joey explained. "I may not be able to walk or use my hands as easily, but I still have the same interests and feelings and thoughts as you."

After more discussion, the students eagerly wrote in their journals. I then asked them to divide into groups and invited them to share their journal entries. They always have the option to pass, but this time no one did.