The Student Leaders Project, one measure by which the Center for Prevention of Hate Violence helps schools address the climate of hate, hinges on promoting basic decency and respect and improving students’ communication skills.
A recent study conducted by Public Agenda and funded by the Pew Charitable Trusts, under the title "Aggravating Circumstances," found that eight in 10 Americans think a lack of respect and courtesy is a serious problem; six in 10 think the situation has become worse in recent years; 41 percent admit that they’re part of the problem!
And most blame parents, popular culture and the entertainment media for what they perceive as the increasingly discourteous and disrespectful conduct of children. The following outline is adapted with permission from the National School Safety Center’s School Safety Update (May 2002).
Stop for a moment to ask yourself the following questions:
- How do you react when others say please, thank you or excuse me; offer help or a sincere apology; or hold open the door for you?
- How do you feel when you use good manners?
- Can using good manners help children, youth and adults feel more confident or help them to be more successful?
- Can good manners be used to communicate, manage tensions or to help make decisions that can diffuse or deal with difficult situations?
- Can teaching about and modeling good manners for children and youth make our schools safer?
What are manners made of?
- peace-keeping strategies;
- critical thinking and choices;
- inclusion, goodwill and moral strength;
- fairness, justice, kindness, trust
- grace, honor, civility and mutual regard
How to start?
Respect and courtesy can be taught with simple words and actions. They are modeled as a matter of habit by thoughtful adults and peers.
The teaching of manners initiated in early childhood and reinforced through later school years can be an effective school safety strategy.
Manners — as an exercise of critical thinking and choice in social situations, as skills of professional communication and stress management, and as expressions of trust and mutuality — can be practiced daily over a lifetime.
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